RAY Chamberlain is the new Darren Goldspink, the umpire who everyone knows and despises. If you ran a poll to find the most hated person in footy, the ''Razor'' would be up with Stephen Milne and a few others, with the kind of figures that would even make Prime Minister Julia Gillard cringe.
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Ray has been in the headlines, which is not new for him. If you missed it - and that's possible given that it was a Sydney-Fremantle game at the SCG and not covered by free-to-air television - the Swans lost a close one in wet conditions and there were people leaning over the guard rail of the grandstand pointing and spitting bile at the umpires as they departed (and don't tell me that no one has a passion for the game in Sydney!).
Ray was one of the three umpires on the day. As happens with the Razor, he has become the focus of conspiracy theorists who point to the fact Fremantle scored eight of its 15 goals from free kicks. Or to be precise, six from direct free kicks and two more with 50-metre penalties.
John Longmire, the Sydney coach, whipped off an email to Jeff Gieschen and the AFL umpiring department, but as his predecessor Paul Roos observed, that's a waste of cyberspace. The league ticked off the umpires' performance.
The fans were not quite so generous. Out in the social media, a hate campaign against Ray had been re-ignited.
I found five videos on YouTube.com, and here are a couple of examples: ''Chamberlain screw job'', ''Chamberlain robs the Sydney Swans'', ''Ray Chamberlain rapes the Sydney Swans''. You get the picture, and that's without delving into the fan forums, where the vitriol was even more potent.
The AFL doesn't like the look of all this. It has 30 central umpires and in terms of interest, Ray blocks the sun, which is not ideal, not to mention unlikely, when you're vertically challenged. When The Age asked for a Razor interview this week, we could almost hear the groan down the phone from Docklands. Request declined.
But there is something in all this. Footy is theatre, let's face it. Take away the theatrical element, and it's just a game with a bag of wind, a few spectators around an oval parked in cars and tooting their horns.
We're talking about a big stage, and in that environment we need heroes and we need a villain, too. Enter the Razor, arch villain, the only man capable of enraging fans from both sides simultaneously.
What's his problem? Chamberlain gets in the players' faces. He's bound to make a big call somewhere along the line; in fact, he wants to make that call. Armed with that whistle, there is no mistaking who's in charge. Fans, who like their umpires to be submissive, cry foul.
The league knows the issue. They've told him before to rein it in but ultimately, that's Ray. ''We can smash that out of him and turn him into a robot, but that's not Ray Chamberlain either,'' Gieschen told me this week.
The thing is, he can umpire. In 2010, his best year, he officiated his first grand final, and then the replay, and did a brilliant job. In fact, he was hardly noticed, which is rare. But last weekend, a bit of the old Ray bobbed up.
So here's the postscript to last weekend. I watched the game, then went through the tape and looked at the big moments and decisions. Sydney did not lose because of Ray or the other umpires. The Swans lost their rag, started carping and behaving out of character.
Here's another thing. Chamberlain did not pay the 50-metre penalty against Tadhg Kennelly at the end, nor the free kick against Heath Grundy for a throw that led to Fremantle's sealing goal. It was another umpire.
Typically, these things get lost in the noise that surrounds Ray Chamberlain. I asked former umpire Derek Humphery-Smith, a valuable commentator on the topic, for an opinion. ''I think the best umpires are those who complement the contest, not attract attention away from the contest. That's the danger that Ray falls into on occasions,'' he said.
I agree with that. So you work it out, Ray.
Because footy needs people like Ray Chamberlain.
There, I've said it.