In the lounge room of his Albury home, Geoff Steele has a framed black-and-white photograph of the old Melbourne Orphanage in Brighton. It shows a grand, two-storey bluestone building, its windows embellished in white. Dark cypress trees stand sentry at the entrance.
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And oh, how Geoff hates it.
“The reason I have it is to look at it all the time, and drive me forward to get justice. Some people just don’t understand what it was like to be incarcerated in those places as a child. You had a number, no rights, no love or compassion,” says the 71-year-old.
Imagine Geoff as young boy. He’s shy, with a big blond mop of hair. But he’s also a happy little fella. Animals and steam trains enchant him and under his arm he often carries his favourite soft toys; Donald Duck and a well-loved monkey.
When he is nine, Geoff’s mother lands a job in the baby section of the Melbourne Orphanage, in the genteel bayside suburb of Brighton. And her son is separated from her, forced to live in a dormitory with 50 boys in another part of the orphanage. He does not see his mum once in 18 months, even though she works near his dorm.
So he doesn’t know that a few months into the job she has a nervous breakdown, is admitted to the Larundel Mental Asylum and lobotomised, with the permission of the chief executive of the orphanage. She never really recovers and remains a “sick and damaged lady” throughout her life.
But he does know something grim and terrifying happens to him one night in the orphanage laundry. This experience leaves him traumatised, and colours the rest of his life. And it takes him 51 years to write the words “I was raped at nine years old”, almost subconsciously, in a letter one morning to his solicitor. Along with about 8000 other child sexual abuse survivors Geoff, told his painful story to the Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse. Finally, he was believed and it lifted some of the burden he was carrying inside.
Some people just don’t understand what it was like to be incarcerated in those places as a child.
- Geoff Steele
The royal commission delivered its exhaustive and powerful 17-volume report almost a year ago. Commissioners found the innocence and future of thousands of children, over generations, had been wrested from them by sexual predators at the very institutions where they should have been safe. This child sexual abuse was a national disgrace, and the nature of that abuse “so heinous it was difficult to comprehend”.
At 11am, Prime Minister Scott Morrison will deliver a national apology to child sexual abuse victims and survivors at Parliament House. Opposition Leader Bill Shorten will also speak. These will be heard by 800 in the Great Hall. Still more will gather on the lawns outside and around the country the televised apology will be watched at local stadiums and community halls. There are an estimated 60,000 victims and survivors in Australia.
Many will find the day intensely painful, says Craig Hughes-Cashmore, the co-founder of the Survivors & Mates Support Network, which has a number of members going.
Watch the apology:
“There are a lot of people who have never disclosed their abuse and they will be greatly affected.”
Hughes-Cashmore is also a member of the apology reference committee, which travelled the country to ask survivors how to create an apology that would resonate. Some told him they’d organised to take the day off work, even the whole week, apprehensive about how they’d react. And while it might bring great comfort to some, others remain bitterly suspicious of governments and official gestures.
Whatever the wording of the apology, it must be heartfelt, genuine and sincere, people told the reference group, and it must be matched with action. In their findings, the commissioners noted survivors were remarkable people with a common concern to do what they could to ensure other children are not abused: “They deserve our nation’s thanks.”
Five years ago, Julia Gillard’s moving parliamentary apology to the mothers and families affected by forced adoptions unfortunately became a media footnote in a week where a clumsy (and ultimately uncontested) leadership spill saw her reconfirmed as PM.
Now there are fears the political wash-up from the Wentworth byelection on Saturday could distract. “I am concerned politicians will head back into Parliament on Monday and start squabbling after such a solemn event,” says Hughes-Cashmore. “This is a day for child survivors and their supporters. Not to start fighting over the spoils of Wentworth.”
Yesterday Geoff Steele got into his car to travel to Parliament House. He likes driving, always has. The car is quiet, the road gives him space to think. Life has been tough. After the orphanage he became an angry, disturbed, aggressive teen. Not good social material, in his own words.
“Things have been one disaster after another, and mainly I created them. But I’m not stupid, I’m a kind and compassionate person at heart.” Finding his siblings, a brother and two sisters, has helped. The 71-year-old feels drawn to witness the apology. “I’m somewhere between cynical and glad the Australian public has become more aware through this long, long process. It’s like everything else I’ve done in life; you tough it and then try and get home safely afterwards.”
Miki Perkins is the social affairs editor at The Age.
- Lifeline: 13 11 14; 1800 Respect National Sexual Assault and Family Violence Counselling Service: 1800 737 732