The family of a Norske Skog worker killed in an industrial incident still mourns his death every hour of every day.
Norske Skog has been charged with workplace health and safety breaches following the deaths of Lyndon Quinlivan and Ben Pascall after a suspected gas leak at the paper mill in May last year.
Tom Johnson was seriously injured but was later released from hospital.
A third crew member, Davern Neall, wasn't physically injured but died a few weeks later.
Mr Quinlivan's wife, Jacci, has spoken publicly for the first time since his death in the hopes it will save other families from losing loved ones.
It hurts every second of every day, everything is a reminder of what has been taken from myself, our children, his parents, his sister, my parentsJacci Quinlivan
She hopes legal action taken by SafeWork NSW - which alleges the company failed in its primary duty of care to ensure staff health and safety - will bring some closure and understanding of the event.
"It absolutely doesn't get any easier," Ms Quinlivan said.
"You put on that mask every day because people expect you to act a certain way, but they don't know what goes on behind closed doors.
"It doesn't get any easier, it gets harder."
Mr Quinlivan was a father-of-two and had worked at the paper mill for 18 years.
He grew up on the Border.
His wife hasn't returned to the site, only a short distance from her home, and vows she never will.
"Where we live, you can see the big smoke that the mill puts up," she said.
"We can see that from our house.
"That's hard enough but we will never go back out there again.
"It hurts every second of every day, everything is a reminder of what has been taken from myself, our children, his parents, his sister, my parents, the list goes on."
Each event, milestone and anniversary is also a reminder to the family of what they have lost.
The 35-year-old was an avid tenpin bowler, which his son has taken up.
Ms Quinlivan said her late partner should be taking him to tournaments, which had been taken from him in the incident.
"Lyndon had a right and an expectation to come home from work that day," she said.
"Instead, I received a call while I was at work that altered my life and our young children's lives forever, not to mention his own mother, father and sister.
"My husband is a beautiful family man, he would do anything for his family and mates.
"He is the world's best father, he was always doing things for them and with them to make them feel how very much he loved them."
"It's still there every day," she said at the time.
"Some days it depends on your frame of mind, but it certainly doesn't get easier.
"I just try to keep living and do what Ben would want me to do."
SafeWork NSW released a statement on Monday confirming the company has been charged.
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Representatives will face court early next year.
"SafeWork NSW has completed its investigation into the Norske Skog workplace incident from May 2018," a spokesman said.
"Proceedings were commenced before the District Court of NSW under section 32 of the act for breach of the duty under section 19(1) of the Work Health Safety Act 2011.
"The first mention date is February 3, 2020."
The act states those conducting a business or undertaking must ensure the health and safety of employees and other workers.
The incident reportedly involved hydrogen sulphide leaking at the plant and workers being overcome by the gas.
Ms Quinlivan is pushing for NSW to create an offence of industrial manslaughter.
Such laws passed in Victoria last week and exist in other states, with moves to introduce national laws for industrial manslaughter.
Ms Quinlivan watched live reporting as the Victorian legislation was passed in Parliament.
Employers will face maximum jail terms of 20 years and fines of up to $16.5 million under the changes.
"I am the voice of my husband Lyndon, and I will fight for justice, accountability and change to this broken system so others don't need to travel the path that's been thrown upon us," she said.
"I will fight for tougher laws and to introduce industrial manslaughter in NSW, and the rest of the jurisdictions without it.
"If nothing happens, more and more people will die avoidable deaths.
"People are dying in Australian workplaces every day.
"I have met so many families, just like my own.
"The numbers are scary and it's not OK.
"It's gaining momentum.
"Unfortunately, NSW is lagging behind."
Ms Quinlivan said she would also continue to push for answers in her husband's case.
"I need to know exactly what happened," she said.
"I need to know who failed, I need to know where the failures were.
"Every day is a struggle for us.
"It never ends.
"I will never rebuild from this.
"It hasn't just been his life lost, it's all of our lives that have been lost."
A call to Norske Skog general manager Milo Foster was not returned.