WHEN Eliza Hull was ready to start a family, she was not prepared for her doctor's blatantly rude reaction.
Subscribe now for unlimited access.
$0/
(min cost $0)
or signup to continue reading
Hull was diagnosed at five with Charcot-Marie-Tooth disease, a degenerative nerve disease that impacts movement mostly in the arms and legs.
There was a 50 per cent chance her children would develop it.
Hull says her neurologist was overtly dismissive of her pregnancy plans from the outset.
"I wanted to have a family and he was basically saying to me he didn't want me to risk having a child like me," she recalls.
"It showed me how widespread discrimination is in the medical system."
The Wodonga-raised musician, writer, journalist and disability advocate says parents with a disability routinely face discrimination in the health system and in the broader community.
She says raising children can be isolating and difficult for anybody at the best of times but parents with a disability are used to navigating challenges.
"All parents require the skills of problem solving and flexibility; we already have to do that every day," Hull explains.
"I've got a physical disability meaning I can't get into places with stairs; I already have to think of ways I'm going to navigate it differently to get where I'm going."
Now living and working at Castlemaine in the Goldfields region, Hull is happily raising Isobel, 7, and Archie, 2, with her husband Karl.
She simply adjusts to the circumstances at hand and her children are flourishing.
"With Archie, if there are a lot of stairs we just sit down and go down one by one," she says.
"Getting him out of the car, I lean up against the car for support.
"One of the real benefits I'm seeing in my daughter is that she'll pick up any toys lying around on the floor so I don't trip and she'll pull me across the road if there's traffic coming.
"In the kinder line, when children asked her 'What happened to your mum?' and the other parents didn't know what to say so they brushed it off, my daughter said: 'No, that's not true; she has a disability.'
"We should let children be kind and be curious because it reduces stigma."
An award-winning musician, Hull is a contributor to Growing Up Disabled in Australia while her podcast series on parenting with a disability, We've Got This, is one of Radio National's and ABC Life's most successful series of all time.
Her new book, We've Got This: Stories By Disabled Parents, is the first major anthology by parents with disabilities. Twenty-five parents who identify as deaf, disabled or chronically ill discuss their parenting journeys and reveal that the greatest obstacles often lie in other people's attitudes.
Hull says more than 15 per cent of Australian households have a parent with a disability yet their stories are rarely shared and their experiences almost never reflected in parenting literature.
The year-long project began with an extensive online callout to reflect a broad spectrum of families.
"Because people fear disability, it feeds into the idea that people with a disability shouldn't be parents," Hull says.
"I see it as all part of the tapestry of what makes the world beautiful. I see the beauty in having a parent with a disability; my child is so kind and empathetic and is open to diversity in all of its forms."
Hull says she wanted to create the kind of resource that wasn't available to her when she started her parenthood journey.
"When I was pregnant with my daughter eight years ago there wasn't anything out there," she says.
"I also want it to reach the wider community who may have assumptions about what parents with a disability can do."
Hull says her life changed dramatically in 2018 when her podcast series began to explore the complexities of parenting with a disability and challenge the stereotypes.
It was revelatory for herself too.
"I'm a touring musician and I learnt how to hide my disability," Hull says.
"If I was doing an interview I'd arrange to already be sitting down; it was a kind of internalised ableism.
"It was only due to having a child that I knew it was time to model authenticity or how could I expect my child to do it!"
Hull believes parents with disabilities are often set up to fail; the anthology reveals blind parents not being allowed guide dogs in hospitals and Deaf parents congratulated when their offspring is hearing.
"I feel like the anthology deals with something that has been very taboo," she says.
"We are starting to see greater representation of people with a disability in film and in the media; change is happening, slowly."
To this day Hull is grateful she was never deterred by her ignorant neurologist.
"If I had of listened to him I wouldn't have the two beautiful kids I have that make my life so joyful!"
- Hull will be joined by writer and appearance activist Carly Findlay for a talk about the anthology at The Cube Wodonga on Thursday at 7pm.