Matt Griffiths was going to be the best man at Dan Holt's wedding.
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The pair met on their first day of primary school at St Anne's, Albury and had been mates ever since.
"Matt was more like a brother than a friend," Dan reflects.
"He was a happy, bubbly person - he was charismatic and a great communicator.
"He was the most unlikely person you would imagine to die by suicide."
The 38-year-old father of two died on February 9 this year - three days before he could fulfil his best man duties.
For his widow, Grace Griffiths, and their sons Tommy and James, the grief is "still so raw" as they face life without a loving husband and doting father.
And yet Grace is determined their sons will grow up understanding that "it's OK not to be OK".
"Matt was such a confident, happy and charming person," she reflects.
"You'd think he was the last one who would be suffering ..."
Dan is organising a fundraiser to support Grace and the boys and to raise awareness about the importance of seeking help.
The event, at Albury's Newmarket Hotel on June 5, will include an informal Q&A-style panel with Stuart Baker (Survivors of Suicide & Friends/Winter Solstice co-founder), Dean Hyland (Headspace Albury-Wodonga) and a representative from Boys to the Bush.
The afternoon will close with a charity auction of up to 80 lots including accommodation packages, gym memberships, firewood, tools, meat trays and sporting memorabilia; Dan says it's no surprise the big-hearted Border community has been generous in its support.
He also hopes the event will serve as a powerful reminder to those attending that it takes courage to be vulnerable - that this community has people who care and there is help available.
"It's only halfway through the year and already three people I'm connected with (all men) have been lost to suicide," he says.
"I think it's one of the more desperate situations in Australia right now.
"We're not getting it right and certainly not in rural and regional Australia and certainly not with men."
Dan admits he was once naive enough to think his life wouldn't be touched by suicide.
"What I knew about suicide and the journey afterwards you could write on a business card," he says.
"But I've learnt that suicide grief is very complex. The processing is different; there isn't a manual for this."
The shock waves of "Griffo's" death richocheted across the community.
"Matt was very open about being a reformed gambler - he was a guy who could take on anything and beat it," Dan says.
"He came from a loving and supportive family ...
"And we had all the big chats, usually around a fire pit with too many beers, where we'd talk about family, work struggles and health."
A registered nurse, Grace says talking about mental health is still "taboo".
"You don't have experience of it until it happens close to you," she says.
"Mental health for men is still not explored enough - and yet they are suffering the most."
Grace hopes more awareness can be raised about the importance of men reaching out for help as she grapples with the loss of "the one person in the world you most want to be here".
Dan says it starts with vulnerability.
"And if just a few of the maybe 150 men who attend on June 5 walk away feeling that help is only a conversation away, then we have achieved something!"
Fundraiser for family
- The fundraiser for the family of Matt 'Griffo' Griffiths will be held at the Newmarket Hotel, Albury on Sunday, June 5, from 12pm. Tickets $150pp, (includes alcohol and a BBQ lunch).
- There will be a Q&A-style panel with Stuart Baker (Winter Solstice co-founder), Dean Hyland (Headspace Albury/Wodonga) and a representative from Boys To The Bush.
- Do you need help? Call Lifeline: 13 11 14.