BRENT GODDE: Do you have a nickname?

MICK MALONEY: No really, everyone just calls me Mick which I prefer over Michael.

BG: Give us a brief history of your footy career?

MM: I played juniors at St Patrick's and never played seniors. I played a few reserves games for South Albury in the Tallangatta league and spent a few years playing for Bethanga reserves as well.

BG: How would you describe yourself as a footballer?

MM: Two words - average Joe.

BG: How did you get involved in umpiring?

MM: I always had ambitions to umpire whenever I finished playing footy. So that's what I did and started umpiring in 1984 when in my early 30s.

BG: Do you still remember the first match you umpired?

MM: It was Kiewa-Sandy Creek against Wodonga Demons in the fourths.

BG: You kept an umpiring diary throughout your career?

MM: I kept records of every game I umpired. Just basic information of what sides played, where at and the final score. Also milestones, like my first O&M match, grand finals and stuff like that.

BG: How many matches did you end up umpiring?

MM: It was a tick over 750 matches.

BG: How old were you when you retired?

MM: It was in 2009 and I was getting close to 60. I did a handful of matches as a club umpire after that.

BG: You were relatively young to retire from umpiring?

MM: To be honest I became a bit disenchanted when the Albury Umpire League was taken over by the North East Border. I'm a believer in that umpires should be in charge of umpiring.

BG: No doubt you would have dozens of entertaining stories from your umpiring days. Hit me with some of your favourites.

MM: One of my favourites was when I was umpiring the reserves out at Osborne and travelled out there with the senior umpire.

BG: You got a bit of a surprise after you had finished umpiring the reserves?

MM: I was in the umpires changeroom and the netballers came in to have a shower after they had finished playing.

BG: The girls decided to play a prank?

MM: The senior umpire who was still umpiring had his nice white shirt hanging up on a hook in the changerooms. One of the girls couldn't resist and kissed the shirt and left a big lipstick mark. I roared laughing when I noticed it.

BG: Your second match as an umpire was memorable for the wrong reason?

MM: I had to umpire the Buraja juniors and got dropped off at Buraja by another umpire who was on his way to Urana.

BG: Turns out you were at the wrong venue?

MM: I bumped into Trevor Kuschert who was cleaning the rooms. He said 'what are you doing here Mick, there's no footy here today.'

BG: What did you do?

MM: I was fuming, it was only early in the morning and I had to sit around at Buraja by myself until the other umpire returned from Urana after dark. With hindsight I should have just hitchhiked home.

BG: The umpires' changerooms weren't anything flash when you first started your career?

MM: I remember when I first started doing finals at Sandy Creek, the umpires used to have to get changed in a tent.

BG: Obviously not ideal.

MM: It was funny one day the reserve umpires got on the cans in the tent after they had finished and fell over and knocked it down.

BG: After a few years the facilities were upgraded?

MM: Yeah, they got rid of the tent and upgraded to a garden shed which was hardly ideal either.

BG: The Hume league facilities at Walbundrie weren't much better for umpires either?

MM: When I first went to Walbundrie, the umpires had to get changed in the old chook shed behind the goals.

BG: Back in that era, the league would also get an umpire from the VFL to officiate in the grand final?

MM: Yeah they did but it didn't matter, they still had to get changed in the chook shed with the rest of us.

BG: What was the hospitality from the league like during that era?

MM: I've got nothing against Des Kennedy but he used to put a thermos in the chook shed with a pack of Arnotts biscuits and think he was doing you a favour.

BG: You have given us a bit of gold there but you were involved in two serious incidents during your career?

MM: I was umpiring Murray Magpies against Oaklands at Urana in 2002 and reported Hawks ruckman Jason Habermann for making contact with an umpire.

BG: Obviously a serious charge, what is your version of events?

MM: The short version is a scuffle broke out between the two sides near the Murray Magpies' interchange bench. I ran over to break it up and copped an elbow to the stomach which winded me.

BG: It floored you?

MM: It zapped me and I fell to the ground winded but got up when I got my breath back.

BG: What happened next?

MM: Habermann didn't try to run off or anything and just stood there and I said 'I'm reporting you for making contact with an umpire.' He didn't say anything back.

BG: How did the tribunal unfold?

MM: Habermann pleaded not guilty. The case centred around whether it was an accidental or intentional act and if I had gotten too close to the player involved.

BG: History says Habermann copped four weeks. Was that a fair penalty?

MM: It didn't worry me to be honest, I just gave my evidence and accepted the tribunal's decision.

BG: No doubt a big story which attracted headlines at the time?

MM: I remember The Border Mail called asking me for a comment. I just said 'it's finished with, move on.' But I never umpired another Oaklands match again by choice.

BG: Another serious incident was when you were spat on during the 2001 grand final between Corryong and Federal?

MM: I won't name the player but a Federal player spat in my face right at the end of the match.

BG: What happened?

MM: There was a bit of a melee between a few players which I ran into to break up. The Federal player basically looked at me and spat into my face.

BG: How did you react?

MM: I couldn't send him off because the match was over but I obviously reported the player involved.

BG: You weren't happy how the tribunal unfolded?

MM: In my opinion the league tried to sweep the incident under the carpet.

BG: Did the player involved plead guilty?

MM: He was only at the tribunal by a phone link up and said he didn't remember the incident because he was concussed.

BG: What was the penalty?

MM: He got two weeks which was a joke. There was also no publicity about the incident because the league kept it quiet.

BG: You were obviously fuming with the penalty?

MM: If the AUL was fair dinkum they should have never sent umpires to the competition again. I refused to umpire in the Upper Murray ever again.

BG: How many players did you report over your career?

MM: At a guess, maybe 20. Most of them were for charging.

BG: Was it frustrating to see players get off lightly for some offences?

MM: I remember the 1992 grand final in the Coreen league a Rennie player ran through a Rand player off the ball and only got two weeks. I thought that was probably worth a bit more.

BG: Opposing players had a habit of fabricating their evidence to support each other after being reported?

MM: The classic example was a match I umpired between Lavington and Myrtleford and a melee broke out and I reported a Saints player for striking.

BG: The Lavington player was sporting a shiner at the tribunal?

MM: The Lavington player was asked how he got the black eye and his reply was he went down Dean St after the match and it happened at a nightclub.

BG: Quite often you thought you were on trial after reporting a player?

MM: The player's advocate would grill you about your evidence and it felt like the umpire was on trial and not the player.

BG: Did you ever turn a blind eye and not report a player so you didn't have to go to the tribunal?

MM: No, you can't do that and that's not in my nature. I was of the opinion that if you see a report you have to do your job.

BG: You were a big fan when the two week set penalty came into the bush leagues?

MM: A lot of players were quite often happy to take the set penalty which saves going through the rigmarole of the tribunal.

BG: Who do you rate as the best players you have seen in the different leagues locally?

MM: I rate John Smith highly in the O&M and he was just a class above when he went bush to coach Mitta United.

BG: Who else did you rate?

MM: I thought Wayne Styles was a brilliant footballer and he played in a few different competitions. Terry Mardling was very under-rated in my opinion and was a standout player for Daysdale.

BG: You have umpired alongside quite a few characters along the journey?

MM: The standouts would be 'Boola' Mannering and 'Banjo' Pattison who have both sadly passed away in recent times. Bob Mathews and Peter Morey were also entertainers.

BG: Give us your favourite 'Boola' story?

MM: It was when he was playing for Balldale. 'Boola' and John O'Shannassy were coming back into town and spotted a car they recognised outside a pub. O'Shannassy was a big, strong bloke so they decided to turn the car upside down on its roof for a bit of a prank.

BG: 'Boola' didn't mind the physical side of football during his playing days?

MM: I was only a kid when he was playing reserves for Albury but he would be one of the dirtiest players that I've seen.

BG: Give us your favourite 'Banjo' story?

MM: Back in the days when footy clubs had beer tickets, Banjo used to carry a reel of every colour beer ticket in his glove box and enjoy a few "free" beers after every match.

BG: Who are some of the lippiest players that you have encountered?

MM: There are two standouts that I came across.

BG: Are you happy to name and shame them?

MM: I can't see why not. The first would be Culcairn's big ruckman Brad 'Poaches' Smith. I'm yet to meet a woman that whines as much as he did on the football field. In his eyes I don't think I ever made the right decision in my life.

BG: The second?

MM: That would be Mick Spiteri. Some players get whiteline fever but I think it's fair to say Mick had a fair case of small man's syndrome during his playing career. Especially when he was playing for Wodonga Raiders.

BG: Spiteri tried to shake your hand as you were walking off one day after umpiring Raiders and North Albury?

MM: He gave it to me all day and then wanted to shake hands after the game. It was one of the rare times that I gave a player 'fresh air.'

BG: Did you have any tricks to cope with lippy players?

MM: Quite often I would call the runner aside and say tell number ? to shut his mouth or I will send him off.

BG: Some of the best umpires that you have seen locally?

MM: Ken Wright, Jeff Lyon, Russell Wright and Gavin Rixon.

BG: What did you like most about umpiring?

MM: The fitness and camaraderie.

ALSO IN SPORT

BG: Umpiring was a tough gig in the early days?

MM: When I first started there was only one umpire and you would get dropped off in the middle of nowhere to umpire. After the game a lot of the players and officials didn't want to know you and in some regards you were treated like a leper.

BG: When you see a team struggling, do you try to even it up?

MM: You can't do that. But I will say the standard of umpiring went downhill when they introduced club umpires because it's only human nature you are going to be biased towards your club.

BG: The 1996 Coreen league grand final had an unusual raffle prize?

MM: I had to laugh but a dressed pig was first prize and they had it in the back of the ute swinging around as they drove around the ground selling tickets.

BG: Do umpires warn other umpires about known troublemakers?

MM: For sure but a lot of blokes I was warned about I never had trouble with. Marcus Osborne was probably one player that came to mind when he was coach of Rand-Walbundrie but I didn't have an issue with him.

BG: Would you still give votes to a player that was critical of your performance?

MM: If a player abused me he wouldn't feature in my votes.

BG: Any coaches you didn't see eye-to-eye with?

MM: Andrew Dale when he was coach of Myrtleford. Every free kick was wrong in his eyes.

BG: Do you think umpires get paid enough?

MM: I'm not sure what they are on these days but I know in the old days you weren't going to get rich being an umpire.

BG: Umpires were required to have a Hume Permanent account?

MM: Hume Permanent were the major sponsor and if you didn't have an account, you didn't get paid.

BG: Were you ever offered a bribe to influence a match?

MM: Never have, never would.

BG: What's the key to being a good umpire?

MM: Two words - common sense.

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