Whether I’m travelling around the electorate or Melbourne I’m regularly accosted on the street by one of the most annoying of modern creations, the Chugger or charity mugger. You see them inhabiting prominent corners in the city, in shopping centres everywhere, grasping a clip board, waving furiously at passers-by in an attempt to get them to stop and hear their sales pitch.

Once there were no Chuggers, only volunteer charity collectors who would emerge a few times a year. Knowing that your money was helping a local cause like the CFA or local school, you’d happily drop some change into their tin and be on your way.

Not content with change, the chugger wants to reach into your wallet and directly debit a continual monthly stream of altruistic donations from your credit card. Literally the gift that keeps on giving.

Most Australians with their strong sense of fairness, adopt a tried-and-tested method in dealing with them. Head down, stride purposely onward all the while adopting the “I’m very busy, no time to talk face” Better yet pretend to be talking on the phone. Make eye contact and you’re doomed.

Generally, I like to smile, acknowledge them and politely decline to donate the gross national product of New Zealand via electronic funds transfer each month.

As I walk on, as a parting shot I’m usually on the receiving end of some loud pithy comment such as “don’t you care about the environment?” etc.

This really annoys me. It’s not that I don’t care about providing high speed Internet to Bolivian rain forest tribes or protecting the habitat of the rare and endangered southern bearded, orange-chested, freckle-footed, howling grass toad.

It’s just that I don’t want some self-opinionated, holier-than-thou type dictating what causes I should donate to, and then try to shame me if I don’t agree 100 per cent with them. I donate to a number of charities and community organisations, but I like to decide where my money goes, not some aggressive salesperson.

I don’t understand why Victorian governments, both state and local, allow this to go on. In the UK, over 100 councils have banned chuggers.

Perhaps it’s typical of the attitudes of so-called “compassionistas” who think that they know better than you. If you disagree, then clearly you deserve to be shamed and publicly vilified.

Chuggers who regularly also descend on the Border area are using pushy and aggressive sales tactics to get at your hard-earned.

By all means donate if you want to, but stop and think if supporting your local school, CFA or a well-deserving issue, (and remember our local CFA volunteers will be supporting the annual Good Friday Appeal for the Children’s Hospital) is a better use of your cash than saving the habitat of the rare Speckled Mongolian Racing Goose. 

So unlike our Melbourne cousins, who use the ‘head down, walk on, and never make eye contact tactic’, hold your head high, make that eye contact and firmly say NO before the chugger even opens their mouth.

Bill Tilley is the state MP for Benambra. Contrary to public reports he is very fond of the Speckled Mongolian Racing Goose. They taste delicious.