Jodi Cooper, the general manager of the Centre Against Violence in Wodonga, has seen a concerning trend towards a "porn-like script" in assaults of young women in heterosexual relationships.

From sexting and videoing to "extreme end" acts that involve pain as an acceptable part of the sexual experience, she says this type of behaviour is becoming normalised.

"We are seeing an increase in sexual assaults (in the 14 to 17 years age bracket) in the context of intimate relationships - this is new in my time," says Ms Cooper who has worked with the service for 12 years.

"Generally it is the male dominating the female and engaging in activities that might not have typically occurred in the past, such as anal sex.

"When these cases present, it is quite scary."

While it is difficult to draw out data specific to pornography exposure as a key factor in sexual assault cases, Ms Cooper says there has been a jump in the number of children and young people referred to the service's sexually abusive behaviour treatment programs.

"The number of referrals for young people engaging in sexually abusive behaviours has increased by 60 per cent in the past five years," she reveals.

"In the same period there has been a 40 per cent increase in the number of referrals for children (under 10) engaging in concerning sexualised behaviours.

"Anecdotally, I can say that about 70 per cent of young people in our treatment programs have been exposed to pornographic or sexualised imagery either online or via social media or another form of technology such as a mobile phone.

"This has been identified as a contributing driver to their overall sexualised behaviours."

Research shows more than 90 per cent of boys and 60 per cent of girls (13-16 years old) have seen online porn.

Technology has made pornography increasingly accessible to young people with potentially devastating impacts on how they learn about and experience sexuality, according to researcher Maree Crabbe.

The director of the Reality & Risk program will present an information session for parents at Wodonga on May 29, supported by Wodonga Council, Gateway Health, the Victorian education department, Scots School Albury and parent advocates.

She says many adults are unaware of how pervasive pornography has become, the nature of the material young people see or how it is affecting young people's sexual understandings and experiences.

This is not an issue that affects "other people's children", adds Ms Cooper who is at the "pointy end" of the problem.

"As adults, as parents, we are not keeping up with the technology.

"We can't assume that because young people are across technology they are across the messaging of its content ... their social and emotional development does not match their expertise on the devices."

That's why it is imperative parents and carers inform themselves in this space.

"Pornography has become so pervasive and there are added complications when you consider the internet has become more interactive," Ms Cooper says.

"There's evidence young people and children are more likely to be involved in sharing or producing images and films of themselves or others.

"They may be engaging in child pornography without realising it - it would be the furthest thing from their minds."

Ms Cooper is clear about one thing - we can't stop this.

"It's about harm minimisation," she says firmly.

"We need to support kids to have a decision-making framework around a range of social issues.

"We need to be able to engage kids in reflective conversations that question what they see - otherwise they may assume it's real.

"The script is more powerful if they haven't had an alternative narrative laid out."

Nowhere is this more evident than in pornography where performers (mainly female) feign pleasure in violent, often painful acts performed without their consent.

For those working at the coal-face of sexual assault, mainstream porn is particularly problematic.

Lines between consent and control are blurred and gender stereotypes rigidly enforced.

"The porn script is not about enthusiastic consent," Ms Cooper points out.

"I have worked with victims of sexual assault for a very long time; you have to work very hard to help them reinstate that sense of control about what happens to their bodies."

That's why Ms Cooper is such a strong advocate for programs that can equip parents, carers, teachers and young people with the tools to navigate this complex landscape before a crisis hits.

"We know the age of exposure to porn, even inadvertently, is getting younger," she says.

"It is never too young to talk with your children about these things."