But for many reasons, these scenarios continue to be the reality in Albury-Wodonga.

Now a "case for change" is being developed, as governments work towards synergy through initiatives like the National Domestic Violence Order scheme.

Yes Unlimited has contracted two experts to research cross-border issues and improvements for their refuge, Betty's Place.

They are seeking Border women to give their experiences on these issues.

"We've got two projects working in parallel," chief executive Di Glover said.

"We've been looking at the refuge for a long time, because we know its not fit-for-purpose anymore.

"Because in our women's refuge, it's not just women experiencing domestic violence.

"We may have had women exiting prison needing a place to stay, which is not really a good environment for a woman who has experienced violence.

"There's a lot of research being undertaken around what they call a core and cluster model.

"There's also other models we think may be worth looking at, rather than communal living."

Betty's Place began as a grassroots initiative in the 1970s with Betty and Bob Maclean and was taken over by Yes Unlimited in 2014.

The need for change has become apparent in recent years and during COVID-19, with capacity having to be reduced for social distancing.

Ms Glover was initially worried about the impact of this, but it became clear women were choosing temporary accommodation rather than coming to the refuge.

"We believe the extra income [from JobKeeper/Seeker] might have taken some pressure off families or gave them the means to afford to self-fund," she said.

"Women are actively choosing, when they can, not to live in a communal refuge."

Consultants Serena Griggs and Ian Scott will have until mid-2021 to identify refuge alternatives and expand on the findings of Family Violence: Cross Border Issues and Solutions Forum.

That report was compiled by La Trobe Albury-Wodonga researchers on the back of a forum in December, 2019.

Albury-Wodonga Family and Domestic Violence Committee chair Amanda Cohn was a speaker on the day.

"One of the big problems is that the kind of statutory bodies that exist to do strategic and coordination work just forget that Albury-Wodonga exists," she said.

"Even in Victoria, where post-Royal Commission, there's been really excellent investment in family violence services across Victoria, all of their frameworks stop at the river.

"They are things local service providers have talked about for a long time, but presenting that in front of the right people was really the opportunity the forum gave us last year.

"NSW Department of Communities and Justice provided part of the funding for this project, and I think that was partly in response to this report."

The forum and subsequent report identified:

La Trobe senior social work lecturer Heather Downey spoke to The Border Mail after the report's release about recommendations for memorandum of understandings and even a NSW-Victoria joint family violence police unit.

"It's about having a more co-ordinated service system in our very complex cross-border context," she said.

"The impact on victim-survivors - the comments about being bounced from state to state - that was a theme."

Ms Glover agreed there were "complexities of the dual systems" and a more adhoc funding arrangement in NSW.

"We've been concerned about the gaps and the issues for a long time, but I guess having that forum was a catalyst," she said.

"It highlighted the complexities of the dual systems and how there seems to be design in Victoria of a whole system, whereas in NSW it's adhoc funding.

"There's something like three different funding sources that I know of in the domestic violence space in NSW, and yet they don't talk to each other across government."

The call to create a men's behaviour change program in Albury - which was included in a No To Violence 2018 NSW election campaign - was answered on December 1.

Federal government COVID-19 funding allocated by the NSW government, announced for local service providers by Albury MP Justin Clancy, went to an Albury-based program.

It adds to provision on the Victorian side by Gateway Health, which had a wait list of up eight weeks in July.

Dr Cohn said the group-based program for Albury residents was overdue.

"Previously, if a perpetrator was referred by a court into a men's behaviour change program and they lived in Albury, the nearest service accessible was in Wagga," she said.

"Gateway Health provides a fantastic wraparound service ... but that's only for Victorian residents because that's Victorian government funding.

"So, the funding that's just been announced really fills a gap in Albury.

"What I am worried about is the funding that's being provided is short-term and within the framework of services requiring additional funding due to COVID; I don't think that addresses the fact this has always been a problem and we need that service to continue long term and not just for 12 months."

The establishment of a men's behaviour change program in Albury was among four strategic goals of the Albury-Wodonga Family and Domestic Violence Committee set last year, now achieved.

"What we want to come out of this is a short, medium and long-term strategic plan for the whole sector for Albury-Wodonga," Dr Cohn said.

Albury MP Justin Clancy said he was encouraging the uptake of the program so that "through demonstrable benefit we can continue to argue for further funding".

"Whilst I am conscious that this program is funded through the Commonwealth for the next 12 months, my advocacy was based on my understanding of the importance of this program through discussions with local stakeholders," he said.

Mr Clancy said many matters were handled differently by the two states.

"I am supportive of the current study that Yes Unlimited are doing in exploring the differences between the states on domestic violence," he said.

"The recent visit from the Attorney-General was an important opportunity to allow him to speak first hand with stakeholders at the local level, as part of advocacy for further harmonisation between the states and further improvements."

La Trobe University's third family violence forum took place on Tuesday, as part of the 16 Days of Activism Against Gender-Based Violence (November 25 to December 10).

Social work lecturer Virginia Mansel Lees said the virtual forum picked up on findings from last year.

"We didn't want to stop the momentum," she said.

IN OTHER NEWS:

"Many of the reforms on the Victorian side of the border are continuing along - Joseph Lumanog from the men's behaviour change program at Gateway spoke of taking up some changes in 2021.

"People in some agencies have done well and others have found this year really difficult. "Initially numbers were down on women reporting and then all of a sudden they went up.

"Being able to use Zoom meant people could be anywhere, or in their car, and able to access a service.

"I felt at the end a real sense of purpose and participants wanting to move into 2021 and start planning."

The forum will return during the 16 Days of Activism in 2021.